In Indian families, it is often expected that the daughter-in-law will take over household responsibilities after marriage. However, in many cases, the mother-in-law remains in charge, leaving the daughter-in-law feeling more like a guest than an integral part of the family. This situation is seen in the famous Bachchan household as well, where Jaya Bachchan continues to manage the home even after Aishwarya Rai’s entry into the family. This dynamic, familiar to many Indian households, brings to light the complex relationships between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law.
Amitabh Bachchan’s Insight on Family Dynamics
During an episode of Kaun Banega Crorepati 16, Amitabh Bachchan revealed an interesting aspect of his family life. He shared that Jaya still oversees all the important household decisions, especially those related to cooking and food preferences. Amitabh mentioned that Jaya has been taking care of the household for over 50 years and knows what each family member likes. This dedication to maintaining harmony at home is a reflection of how Indian families, even those as modern and high-profile as the Bachchans, maintain traditional roles within the family.
While this may seem like a normal arrangement, it highlights the challenges many daughters-in-law face when trying to integrate into their new families.
Jaya and Aishwarya’s Close Bond
It’s no secret that Jaya and Aishwarya share a strong bond. Abhishek Bachchan himself has mentioned in interviews that his wife Aishwarya and his mother are very close, almost like best friends. Jaya is known to be protective of Aishwarya, and their relationship seems to be one of mutual respect. However, despite this closeness, Jaya continues to manage the household.
Why Today’s Daughters-in-Law Want Responsibility
In many Indian homes, the dynamic between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is different. Unlike the friendly relationship between Jaya and Aishwarya, many daughters-in-law feel left out when their mothers-in-law refuse to share responsibilities, especially household duties. Modern daughters-in-law often feel that if they are treated as part of the family, they should also be entrusted with the responsibility of running the household.
The transition of control from mother-in-law to daughter-in-law is not always smooth. Many daughters-in-law believe they should have a say in important decisions regarding the home, and not just be passive observers. Without this, they may feel disempowered and disconnected from their new family.
Mother-in-Law’s Influence Can Cause Distance
One of the most common complaints from daughters-in-law is that even after years of marriage, their mothers-in-law continue to control the household, especially the kitchen. This creates frustration, as the daughters-in-law feel that they are not fully integrated into the family. If they are not given the chance to take on household responsibilities, they may feel sidelined and unimportant.
This can also affect the overall relationship between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. While the mother-in-law may think she is helping by managing everything, the daughter-in-law may see it as a sign that she is not trusted to handle the family’s affairs.
Balancing Tradition with Modern Expectations
Traditionally, mothers-in-law in Indian households often held the reins of power, especially when it came to managing the kitchen and overseeing household duties. However, times are changing, and modern daughters-in-law want to play an active role in the family. They are not just looking to be caretakers, but equal partners in managing family responsibilities.
While it’s important to respect traditions, it is equally important for mothers-in-law to understand that sharing responsibilities with the daughter-in-law can strengthen their relationship. By giving the daughter-in-law a voice in household decisions, the family dynamic becomes more balanced and harmonious.
Giving the Daughter-in-Law Her Due Role
It’s not just about cooking or managing the house; it’s about inclusion. Many daughters-in-law feel left out when their opinions are not sought for major decisions. While the mother-in-law may consult her own daughter, the daughter-in-law may feel like an outsider. Including the daughter-in-law in these discussions is a simple yet powerful way to make her feel valued.
This is not to say that the mother-in-law should relinquish all control. Instead, she can involve the daughter-in-law in decision-making processes, allowing her to gradually take on more responsibilities. This builds trust and creates a stronger bond between them.
Letting Go of the Kitchen
After a few years of marriage, it’s natural for the daughter-in-law to take charge of the kitchen and other household duties. It helps her become more familiar with the preferences and routines of the family. By allowing the daughter-in-law to manage these responsibilities, the mother-in-law frees herself from the day-to-day tasks and helps her daughter-in-law feel more at home.
In many cases, this transition happens naturally, but in families where the mother-in-law is reluctant to let go, it can lead to tension. It’s essential for the mother-in-law to trust her daughter-in-law and give her the opportunity to learn and grow into her role
The dynamic between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law, like that of Jaya Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai, is complex and varies from family to family. However, it is clear that modern daughters-in-law desire a more active role in household responsibilities. By sharing duties and making the daughter-in-law feel like a valued member of the family, the relationship can flourish.
